Meditations

All my life I've heard the idea that you should not concern yourself with things you have no control over. And I thought I did not feel any pressure from situations that are out of my control. But it seems, as with most things when learning, this was not the case. And in the future I'll probably think of myself the way I do now about my previous self.

Motivation

I've been called Stoic before (in the personality sense) but never learned about Stoic philosophy. And the more I read about its defining traits, the more I recognized myself in them, and what I wanted to aspire to. So I looked up the book that people said was a Stoic classic, and landed on Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

What is it?

From what I gathered from the preface, it's a journal written by a Roman emperor on the battlefield (around 70AD) during the last years of his life. Being previously thought values from other great Stoic thinkers, he tried to live his life according to these values, and ultimately poured all his knowledge inside this journal that was never meant for publication. After his death by illness the journal was discovered, taken, and kept for several years before being published in any meaningful way. I think it's really cool that works like these can survive for so long, us being to able to read it almost 2000 years later.

What is it about?

Stoicism in short is about controlling your actions and moral improvement. There is this recognition that your response to situations is influenced, but not controlled, by your emotions. So you are encouraged to feel sad or happy, but your actions should be in line with what you yourself think is right. In a moment of anger your thoughts on what is right are heavily influenced, but the Stoic recognizes that if they were to act in anger this would not align with their sober thoughts. It's basically "count to ten before you do something stupid".

And this book is a collection of the thoughts of Marcus Aurelius, who tried to live closely to the Stoic principles. There is no common thread among the entries. The one day there can be a journal entry saying "Be glad you woke up today", and the next one is a few paragraphs long with allegories galore.

Some quotes to give you a taste:

"If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment."

"Your mind will be like its habitual thoughts; for the soul becomes dyed with the colour of its thoughts."

What I liked about Meditations is that Marcus Aurelius wasn't trying to teach anyone else, it was meant for himself, to remind himself of what was important to him. And this made the book very transparent and personal. I wasn't being schooled by a philosopher, I was reading the struggles and the enlightenments the philosopher had himself. It felt very sobering and connecting to me.

Understanding

Maybe because of the struggles he was willing to share, or because of the repeating lessons in the passages, the lesson of letting go was imprinted more heavily upon myself. Before reading this book things still 'got' to me, annoying things elevated my heart beat, and I couldn't concentrate as well as I would have liked. But after reading it this just didn't happen anymore. I hate to say a book changed my life[1], but this one did.

My absolute favorite passage

This is the passage that I remember daily that gets me back on track the best. It says that your thoughts keep flowing from the same spring (your mind), and if you keep that spring focused on living a good life, your thoughts and actions will follow, and you yourself will be a steady stream of goodness. Even when outside forces taint your thoughts, the spring will eventually wash out the filth.

"Suppose that a man should stand by a limpid pure spring, and curse it, the spring never ceases sending up potable water; and if he should cast clay into it or filth, it will speedily disperse them and wash them out, and will not be at all polluted. How then shall you possess a perpetual fountain and not a mere well? By forming yourself hourly to freedom conjoined with contentment, simplicity, and modesty."

My issues

I haven't researched more yet, but I will have to look up more information on these two issues I have with it.

Sitting back

Marcus Aurelius teaches that your actions will influence others only if they are willing to change, and that you should not force your ways upon others. Leading by example is the motto. And you yourself should not be influenced by others, focus on being good yourself. This can be why Stoics are seen as laid back and accepting of a lot.

The problem I have with this are situations in society where someone, for example, blasts a tune on public transport. It is fine according to Marcus Aurelius to say something of it, but after you receive a "Nah", that's it. There's nothing more I feel I can do without being a person I don't want to be. I don't want to nag, I don't want to be a snitch, I just want to let someone else calmly know that what they are doing is annoying. And to me it kinda feels like I'm someone that backs down at the slightest pushback.

Leading by example

I think this is the cleanest way to lead, but as described before, it depends mostly on who is willing to change. I'm not out to convert people to a way of life. But if there was some need to convince someone of a certain action to take, leading by example seems the slowest way to do so. One time though, I had someone tell me they changed their actions because "Frank [that's me] never does that, and I like that he doesn't do that". And that felt incredible.

Notes

1. Everything changes a life. If I would skip breakfast, that would change my life in some way. But you get what I mean, a more meaningful change.